Sue's Blog - Some assembly required.

Steatopygic

This is the hole in the side of the house made by the Yaffingale.

Some of you may be wondering what the %$#@ I am talking about.  Well, to save most of you looking it up....it is another word for Woodpecker.
What a beautiful hole the little sod has made.   It is right at the top of the house where no Philip laden ladder will ever venture, so I suppose we shall have to get someone of a more picayune build to mend it.
The reason I am using obscure words is the result of my annoyance at the book I recently started reading.
On page two there were these two words -  Quondam and Embonpoint.
Now I don't consider my vocabulary to be poor.
In fact I spent many years trying instill literacy into dear little souls who frequently used terms like "could of" instead of "could have" and never could tell when to use "their or there" or "to, too & two"......oh ok...I won't get started.
Anyway, this author irritated me enormously with the use of these obscure and possibly obsolete words.
They story is set in modern day, so no excuse there.  Nope, she is just trying to be clever.
I have since been treated to - Agitrop and Barratry.
We shall see how many more times she tries to make me feel stoopy........I bet stoopy won't be in there.

I went to the mall today.  I found a couple of 'Billy Bargains' in Sears for Philip.
Well, actually I found a couple for myself first.
I got two pairs of good jeans for $11 each.  Lubbly jubbly.....look that up Mrs Author Lady !!!
For Philip I found two really lovely sweaters.
They were in the clearance section and started life at $30 each.
They had been reduced, just for today, to...........$3.99 each.
Which takes me on to my next rant.
Some men shouldn't be allowed out shopping on their own.

As I queued to pay for my treasures, there was a man in front of me.
He was returning some pants.
Underpants.
He said he had bought them but his wife didn't like them and made him bring them back to change them.
He wouldn't have got away with this in England.  Although he had the receipt, the labels and tags had all been removed.  He may have even worn them.
But the assistant calmly agreed to change them.  He then got all bent out of shape because the ones he had picked now were $2 more expensive.
I waited patiently, with a fixed smile on my face, while he whined about the price and how his wife said he had to change them.
He eventually had to pay the extra money and left after trying three times to use the little credit card machine and messing it up.
The cashier and I smiled indulgently at each other as he bimbled away.
It was all so unnecessary.
Surely everyone knows that married men are never, ever supposed to go shopping for underpants.
Wives buy their husbands' pants.
"sic semper erat, et sic semper erit"

Oh and in case the title of this blog escapes you.  This might help.

posted by Sue Banks @ 2:11 PM